I felt my cell phone vibrate in my pocket. It was Thursday night, and I was at my regular Thursday night bar, where my friend J is the bartender.
"TONIGHT IS WEIRD...I HAVE TO JACK OFF SOON"
I looked across the bar at J. I hadn't seen him send that message, and I was a little startled. He wasn't looking at me; he was pouring a Newcastle and watching the basketball game.
"So?" I sent back.
"WANT TO WATCH?"
J and I used to fuck, but that ended before I moved here. At least it seemed to have. I assumed he got bored with me, or the novelty wore off because I was here all the time now. This line of questioning seemed out of the blue. Still, I was entirely turned on by it.
"Don't jack off," I sent back. "I know a better plan."
"YOU KNOW WHERE TO FIND ME"
A few minutes later, J disappeared into the back of the bar. I found him in the back women's bathroom. I closed the door behind me and locked it. J said, "I don't know what the deal is today. Every since I got up. I jacked off three times already today, and I've been thinking about it since I got here. I..."
"Shut up," I said, grinning.
He grinned back. "You shut up," he said and pulled me toward him.
We kissed briefly, and somewhat awkwardly, half because it had been so long and half because we both knew he couldn't disappear for long without someone noticing that the only bartender was missing.
I pulled away from him and undid his belt, pushing his pants to the floor. I rested my hand on his cock. I could feel the heat from his rock hard cock through his shorts. He pushed his underwear down as I dropped to my knees.
I am always completely in awe of his cock. He is a freak of nature; beyond porn star huge. I'm talking, when I wrap my hand around him, I can't touch my thumb to my middle finger without squeezing him. Add proportionate length to that girth and you're talking a fucking monster dick on this guy. He is also generally a pretty smallish framed man. He's pretty short and not real bulky either, so the overall visual effect of this little guy with a freakishly huge cock is almost unreal.
And it is so much fun to suck. It's somewhat challenging, being that there's really no room in my mouth for any of my usual tricks, so I have to think creatively usually to get the result I want.
Not today, however.
"Mmmm," he moaned softly when I slowly licked his shaft from base to tip. He gently rested his hand on my shoulder. "I'm going to cum fast," he whispered to me. "I've been thinking about this all day." He wasn't kidding. After a few quick teasing sucks, I took all of him in my mouth and sucked hard. He came almost immediately, what little room was left in my mouth was filled with his thick hot cum. It took all of about 10 seconds.
I looked up at him and grinned. "You weren't kidding," I said, as I finished licking him clean and helped him put his pants back together. He said nothing, but gave me a quick hug and kiss before quickly slipping out the door and back behind the bar. I waited a few minutes and followed. I went back to hanging out with my brother and his friends, assuming no one was the wiser.
However, more people see things than you think in a little neighborhood bar. Later on that evening, I was outside with the owner and one of the bouncers discussing the owner's gambling winnings at the track that day. He had won quite a lot that day and was bragging about it. "I'm the pimp daddy of horse-track betting," he announced.
"Well, you were," I teased, "right up until you referred to yourself as 'the pimp daddy' of betting horses."
"Oh, yeah, you can talk," he replied. "Making out with J - that looks real good on your resume."
I looked at the ground and blushed. I felt someone nudge my shoulder.
"Yeah, Amber!" the bouncer joined in. "How was the bathroom tonight anyway?"
I giggled and said no comment. I mean, in a way it was embarrassing, but mostly it just made the whole thing that much hotter, knowing that everyone knew.
I love that bar.
Monday, May 23, 2005
Thursday, April 21, 2005
A Quick Funny
Sorry I've not posted, much is going on around here. Anyway, to tide you over:
I created a MySpace page because all my other friends are doing it.
Last night my friend calls, and in the course of conversation says to me, "Hey, I was reading your MySpace profile. I didn't know you were bi. That's really cool."
I said, "Joe, you've been in my house. Did the dozen naked pictures of girls and the Playboy I had sitting out not give it away?"
and he said, "I just thought you were really into art."
On a related note, I've decided I haven't slept with nearly enough girls. I plan to make a concerted effort to rectify this injustice. Starting...now.
I created a MySpace page because all my other friends are doing it.
Last night my friend calls, and in the course of conversation says to me, "Hey, I was reading your MySpace profile. I didn't know you were bi. That's really cool."
I said, "Joe, you've been in my house. Did the dozen naked pictures of girls and the Playboy I had sitting out not give it away?"
and he said, "I just thought you were really into art."
On a related note, I've decided I haven't slept with nearly enough girls. I plan to make a concerted effort to rectify this injustice. Starting...now.
A Quick Funny
Sorry I've not posted, much is going on around here. Anyway, to tide you over:
I created a MySpace page because all my other friends are doing it.
Last night my friend calls, and in the course of conversation says to me, "Hey, I was reading your MySpace profile. I didn't know you were bi. That's really cool."
I said, "Joe, you've been in my house. Did the dozen naked pictures of girls and the Playboy I had sitting out not give it away?"
and he said, "I just thought you were really into art."
On a related note, I've decided I haven't slept with nearly enough girls. I plan to make a concerted effort to rectify this injustice. Starting...now.
I created a MySpace page because all my other friends are doing it.
Last night my friend calls, and in the course of conversation says to me, "Hey, I was reading your MySpace profile. I didn't know you were bi. That's really cool."
I said, "Joe, you've been in my house. Did the dozen naked pictures of girls and the Playboy I had sitting out not give it away?"
and he said, "I just thought you were really into art."
On a related note, I've decided I haven't slept with nearly enough girls. I plan to make a concerted effort to rectify this injustice. Starting...now.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Hair Pulling 101
I was going through some past experiences today looking for material to post, and I came to the following realization: There is a right way and a wrong way to pull someone's hair.
Thinking back on it, it seems that the people who know how to do it the right way come by it naturally, and the reason for that is that they like doing it for their own gratification. The people who suck at this are the ones who would never think this up on their own and are only doing it in an attempt to make the person who is having their hair pulled happy.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and postulate that most of the readers of this blog are likely to be talented hair-pullers happily yanking away at their partners' lovely locks. On the off-chance that any of you are not, let me take this opportunity to make a few suggestions. After all, if the whole point is only to make your partner happy, you'll want to do a good job at this right?
Basically there are two ways to pull hair correctly. The best way in my opinion is to grab hair in fistfulls as close to the scalp as you can. The closer your hand is to my head, the better. Alternatively, you can twist the hair around your hand a few times and then pull. Obviously this will only work on girls with really long hair. Most trendy hairstyles these days aren't long enough for this to be effective, and frankly, it's better the other way anyway. Do not grab my hair by the very very end of it and pull that way. For one thing, my hair is going to slip out of your hand if you don't get a better grip on it and for another thing, What the hell kind of pussy are you? Really. I should not be able to move my head around without you deliberately relaxing your wrist to allow it. Conversely, you should have enough control over my head to steer it wherever you want it to go.
Next up: you have to let go once in a while. Seriously. This is best for both you and me in the long run. First, if you have the proper grip and are pulling hard enough, your fingers are going to get tired and cramped. You need a rest. Second, if you are pulling on one spot on my head constantly for 20 minutes, my head is going to get numb and I won't feel it anymore. I will also have a splitting headache about a half hour later. I don't want a headache, and trust me, you don't want me around when I have one. Take breaks. Then do it again. It's in everyone's best interest.
Last and most importantly, never NEVER ask me if you are pulling too hard. Just pull my hair and shut the fuck up. You are defeating the whole purpose when you whine "Does this hurt? Do you want me to stop?" YES it hurts, dumbass, that is why I asked you to do it. And if I want you to stop, there's no need to ask because, trust me, you'll know. You'll know because I'll say something like "Not so hard" or "Cut that out" or "OW! WHAT THE FUCK????" If you don't hear something of that nature then you are not pulling too hard. Don't be such a pussy; it is not attractive. If I wanted a pussy I'd go fuck a girl, and I don't allow girls to pull my hair.
This concludes your brief tutorial in the art of erotic hair-pulling. Use this data wisely, grasshopper, and you shall reap many rewards.
Thinking back on it, it seems that the people who know how to do it the right way come by it naturally, and the reason for that is that they like doing it for their own gratification. The people who suck at this are the ones who would never think this up on their own and are only doing it in an attempt to make the person who is having their hair pulled happy.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and postulate that most of the readers of this blog are likely to be talented hair-pullers happily yanking away at their partners' lovely locks. On the off-chance that any of you are not, let me take this opportunity to make a few suggestions. After all, if the whole point is only to make your partner happy, you'll want to do a good job at this right?
Basically there are two ways to pull hair correctly. The best way in my opinion is to grab hair in fistfulls as close to the scalp as you can. The closer your hand is to my head, the better. Alternatively, you can twist the hair around your hand a few times and then pull. Obviously this will only work on girls with really long hair. Most trendy hairstyles these days aren't long enough for this to be effective, and frankly, it's better the other way anyway. Do not grab my hair by the very very end of it and pull that way. For one thing, my hair is going to slip out of your hand if you don't get a better grip on it and for another thing, What the hell kind of pussy are you? Really. I should not be able to move my head around without you deliberately relaxing your wrist to allow it. Conversely, you should have enough control over my head to steer it wherever you want it to go.
Next up: you have to let go once in a while. Seriously. This is best for both you and me in the long run. First, if you have the proper grip and are pulling hard enough, your fingers are going to get tired and cramped. You need a rest. Second, if you are pulling on one spot on my head constantly for 20 minutes, my head is going to get numb and I won't feel it anymore. I will also have a splitting headache about a half hour later. I don't want a headache, and trust me, you don't want me around when I have one. Take breaks. Then do it again. It's in everyone's best interest.
Last and most importantly, never NEVER ask me if you are pulling too hard. Just pull my hair and shut the fuck up. You are defeating the whole purpose when you whine "Does this hurt? Do you want me to stop?" YES it hurts, dumbass, that is why I asked you to do it. And if I want you to stop, there's no need to ask because, trust me, you'll know. You'll know because I'll say something like "Not so hard" or "Cut that out" or "OW! WHAT THE FUCK????" If you don't hear something of that nature then you are not pulling too hard. Don't be such a pussy; it is not attractive. If I wanted a pussy I'd go fuck a girl, and I don't allow girls to pull my hair.
This concludes your brief tutorial in the art of erotic hair-pulling. Use this data wisely, grasshopper, and you shall reap many rewards.
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Today I am in the mood...
...for a blow job. Actually, yesterday and the preceding two days as well. I can't concentrate on anything: work, the book I'm reading, what I'd like to have for lunch...nothing. It is all consuming and demanding my full attention.
I took a bath last night with my waterproof vibrator and a mind full of various fantasies, but to no avail. In fact, I think I made it worse by trying to live out my imagination with nothing but my own thumb to stick in my mouth.
I called my friend this morning and tried to get him to come over, but he was on his way home from work and had "gone too far in the other direction". I had this vision in my head of dragging him into my room, shoving him down on my mattress, yanking his pants down and sucking him off. Would I have been that bold really? Probably not, he intimidates me via superior experience without ever meaning to, but still he would have let me play (I think), and I might actually be getting some work done right about now. Meanie. Ah, well, more fodder for the bathtub I guess.
Outside of that there is no one else to play with here, and it is tormenting me. How is it exactly that in a world of girls that hate giving blow jobs, there exists a girl who LOVES giving blow jobs and yet she is somehow thwarted at every turn? I find this patently unfair. *sulk*
(Note to J - for the record, when I said you get extra credit for finding the post about you, this is not the post I was referring to. )
I took a bath last night with my waterproof vibrator and a mind full of various fantasies, but to no avail. In fact, I think I made it worse by trying to live out my imagination with nothing but my own thumb to stick in my mouth.
I called my friend this morning and tried to get him to come over, but he was on his way home from work and had "gone too far in the other direction". I had this vision in my head of dragging him into my room, shoving him down on my mattress, yanking his pants down and sucking him off. Would I have been that bold really? Probably not, he intimidates me via superior experience without ever meaning to, but still he would have let me play (I think), and I might actually be getting some work done right about now. Meanie. Ah, well, more fodder for the bathtub I guess.
Outside of that there is no one else to play with here, and it is tormenting me. How is it exactly that in a world of girls that hate giving blow jobs, there exists a girl who LOVES giving blow jobs and yet she is somehow thwarted at every turn? I find this patently unfair. *sulk*
(Note to J - for the record, when I said you get extra credit for finding the post about you, this is not the post I was referring to. )
Amber's Fantasy
Destroy me.
Make me submit to only your desires. Reduce me till I exist solely for your amusement. Let loose the fire I see in your glare.
I want to be your whore, your fucktoy, the embodiment of your most errant depravity. Tell me what to be; ignore my feeble protests. Push me to the limit of my boundaries and hold me there until I beg to be released.
I am meant to be used. Fuck my mouth until I can't breathe. Hold me down until I can't fight you. Smack me until my skin is raw.
Even now you intimidate me with your experience. The power of you feeds my fear as you relentlessly drive me further from myself and into a place where nothing exists beyond your brutal lust until I lose, finally, my own consciousness and become, utterly, Yours.
Make me submit to only your desires. Reduce me till I exist solely for your amusement. Let loose the fire I see in your glare.
I want to be your whore, your fucktoy, the embodiment of your most errant depravity. Tell me what to be; ignore my feeble protests. Push me to the limit of my boundaries and hold me there until I beg to be released.
I am meant to be used. Fuck my mouth until I can't breathe. Hold me down until I can't fight you. Smack me until my skin is raw.
Even now you intimidate me with your experience. The power of you feeds my fear as you relentlessly drive me further from myself and into a place where nothing exists beyond your brutal lust until I lose, finally, my own consciousness and become, utterly, Yours.
Friday, March 18, 2005
Masturbating at Work
Masturbating at work is not an activity I would say I engage in frequently. Investment Consulting is not exactly pornographic, after all. Having said that though, there is something inherently hot about conspiring with one's self to get off at the office.
Right now, as I have a cubicle rather than an office with a door like at my old company, this gets even more appealing, because it requires far more stealth than just the casual closing of the door. You have to be very alert to the sound of people coming by, extremely fast to lessen the chance of being interrupted, and as near to silent as possible so as not to arouse the suspicions of your neighbors. All those factors added together create such an incredible amount of tension. When it is released, there is nothing in the world that compares. I am seeing stars right now.
I just had to share.
Right now, as I have a cubicle rather than an office with a door like at my old company, this gets even more appealing, because it requires far more stealth than just the casual closing of the door. You have to be very alert to the sound of people coming by, extremely fast to lessen the chance of being interrupted, and as near to silent as possible so as not to arouse the suspicions of your neighbors. All those factors added together create such an incredible amount of tension. When it is released, there is nothing in the world that compares. I am seeing stars right now.
I just had to share.
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